I repeat myself a lot when I pray

as if saying something more than once will mean more the more times I say it.

I don't necessarily mean I ask for things like peace in my family, reconciliation with my friends, or even good grades lots and lots of times.

But in those moments, I just start saying "Father" lots of times. Countless times. For what seems like an eternity until the only thing I can remember or devote any mental capacity towards, with my own will and desires cast aside, is that I just need my Father to be my Father. Everything falls into place when I can distinguish between what I want and what I need. There is strength in knowing His name and knowing that He is made to be more than enough for me.

And slowly, but surely, I've been feeling like the idols of my heart have been dragged out from the shadows and into the light. Unable to look anywhere basked in light, they squint and writhe on the ground. It's an incredibly pathetic and ugly sight but such is the state of my heart. They'll lash out at me and try to claw past me back into the darkness of the abode they've constructed within me and those lashes hurt. They sting. They rip me up.

But I am equipped with the overflowing strength of the love of Christ and He's the one who casts those demons back into their place and sews me back together.

My Creator is good. My Father is good. My abba is good. My heart will sing no other name.

Here I am, writing about nothing. Hopefully it's not that sad this time around!